Read this core passage again…
- Ephesians 5:25
25 Husbands, love your wives, just as also Christ loved the church and gave Himself for her, 26 to make her holy, cleansing her in the washing of water by the word. 27 He did this to present the church to Himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but holy and blameless. 28 In the same way, husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hates his own flesh, but provides and cares for it, just as Christ does for the church, 30 since we are members of His body. 31 For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.
First things first – What wives are NOT
Let’s back up a few verses. If you’ll notice Paul didn’t spend a lot of time talking to woman in the verses preceding this passage -essentially, only one thought…
In verses 22-24 Paul takes a moment to compare the church’s submission to Christ as the “head” (or shepherd) and the “savior” of the church to how wives are instructed to submit (oh boy, there’s that word again) to their husbands…
In everything?! Watch it guys… don’t get too excited! The responsibility of the health and wellness of our wives and children rests on OUR shoulders. We, as leaders in the marketplace, our churches and in our families, will be held to a much higher standard.
-More on this later.
NOWHERE, however, does the Word instruct wives to be “doormats”, “maids”, lamb-like recipients of verbally abusive commands… “Woman! Where’s the remote? -and I told you I was hungry!“
We’ll expand and further study the Bible’s instruction for women later. For the moment, lets concentrate on what we as husbands must understand:
1) That Biblical instruction for women is not for the purpose of shooting a fire hose of “See what the Bible says you should do?” at our wives.
2) And that, not until WE as men, firmly grasp what the Bible expects of us as Godly husbands, will we learn to lead, protect, nourish and love our wives and families in all humility and Godliness.
We are expected to obediently grow into a tender, loving “shepherd” (sound wimpy? -not at all…); more importantly, the strong, confident “protector” our wives and families deserve; loving and forgiving them unconditionally, as Christ Himself demonstrates for us.
Now… Let’s start to talk about Husbands
SOIL -Deep, black & nutrient-rich (or) shallow, rocky & poor.
I don’t remember exactly where I was at the time, but God gave me a simple but profound insight into the health (or lack of) in a Christian family more directly, mine.
“Son, what kind of soil are you?
At the time, I didn’t fully get it, just what the Holy Spirit’s gentle but direct question meant. Yeah , I could piece together a basic idea, but not to the depth I needed to grasp the concept of what kind of “soil” I was. This would only come as a result of my own deep-dive into the subject; to understand what the Bible says about soil, gardens, withering vs. flourishing plants and crops.
More to come. Until then…
I must stop for the moment, but I’m excited to continue to add more Biblical teaching on this subject. Until more is posted, please take some time to go back to Jesus’ teaching about the vine and the branches in John 15:1-9 and His teaching about the 4 soils in Mark 4:2-9.
Go online to www.biblegateway.com (or your favorite Bible study site) and begin your own study on this subject, always with the question in mind
“What kind of soil am I?”
Let’s dig deep into this together. The goal in my own life and my passion for other Godly men is to root out the weeds, remove the rocks and become the deep, rich, pure soil from which healthy wives and families can grow and flourish!
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(Note: Please ask questions and share your thoughts! These notes are a starting point, a framework where we will continue to add more and more content as a group.)